You know those Churchill Insurance adverts? I don’t reckon that’s a real dog. Dogs are proud creatures whose main failing is that they are cursed to worship Man. I don’t believe that a real dog would talk all that rubbish, not for any amount of money. The same with that ITV morning show. That Presenter, he was once a tennis player. Tennis players are proud creatures, they wear clean white clothing and they stalk backward and forwards on tightly mown, emerald green grass. They brandish expensive racquets with which they blast tennis balls at their equally proud opponents. He shouldn’t be sitting there, wearing make-up, his hair dyed and solid with gel, forced to talk fatuous, mindless rubbish. He should be running free, his mane blowing in the breeze. Or maybe out to Stud, perhaps he’d prefer that.