The Open Wound

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Entries Tagged as 'Hearsay and Gossip'

True Grit

May 22nd, 2013 · No Comments · Hearsay and Gossip

The UK is gripped by another, immense, 4 inch deep, deluge of snow and a new urban myth has emerged; the ‘Phantom Gritter’. As the local councils run out of road salt and argue amongst themselves about whose fault it is, the government purloin supplies of the precious minerals that were destined for the Germans [...]

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Cryptic Code

May 22nd, 2013 · No Comments · Hearsay and Gossip

Manchester United footballer, Nani, has been criticised for playing ‘keepy-uppie’ during the match with Arsenal.  The fact that he had scored two goals and helped create two more was torment enough for the Arsenal players and this piece of exhibition play was just rubbing salt in the wound. Doing ‘keepie-uppies’ during a match is against [...]

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High speed fail

May 20th, 2013 · No Comments · Hearsay and Gossip, News Around

The routes of high-speed rail links to cities in the north of England have now been announced. The 32 billion pound project will create 100,000 jobs, partly because of the thousands of additional bailiffs that will be needed to evict those that are living on the route.  On the positive side was news that the [...]

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Bond Bourne again

May 15th, 2013 · No Comments · Hearsay and Gossip

 You’d think that the Secret Agents’ annual reunion party would be a pretty exciting affair.  Most years the conversation can be very dull. “Hello again, what have you been up to since we last met?” “Sorry old chap, I can’t divulge that.  What was your name again, by the way?” “You know I can’t tell [...]

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Death and Taxes

May 14th, 2013 · No Comments · Hearsay and Gossip

  Richard the Lion Heart is angry with his knights. “We need more money for the Crusade.  What we have will barely cover our duty-free and get us on the ferry!” “But Sire, we’ve taxed the population of France, England and Ireland into the ground.  To get more would be like getting blood from a [...]

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I don’t believe it

May 12th, 2013 · No Comments · Hearsay and Gossip, The Slug and Philosopher

 ”I’ve lost my Faith,” said Ted from behind the froth of his Guinness. It was late in the evening at ‘The Slug and Philosopher’.  The darts match had finished half an hour ago and the victorious visitors from ‘The Randy Cow’ were now sharing in the trays of snacks provided by our Pub’s new Chef. [...]

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