Author Archives: Dr Pete

Around the block

Britain‘s laziest man takes his dog for a walk while sitting in his car.  Kevin Pyle gets his son to drive him round the block while he leads four-year-old pet bullmastiff Bruce alongside.    Our reporter offered to interview Mr … Continue reading

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No answer

A letter written by Oliver Cromwell in 1642 has been unearthed in a council office.   An Essex council spokesman said: “In the letter, dated March 1642, Cromwell recommends a Captain Dodsworth for promotion.  Unfortunately, the letter was put in our … Continue reading

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Money for old rope

A black, iron machine about the size of a single bed stands in the middle of the Dragons Den.  The latest contender climbs the stairs and turns to the four Dragons. “Hello, I’m Joe Punter and I’m here to get … Continue reading

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A day in the life

A man who was taken to hospital after being hit by a train had been knocked down by a car just a few minutes earlier.  Lewis, from Glasgow, Scotland, was hit by the train whilst walking his bicycle across a … Continue reading

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Tips

Hooray!  Cosmopolitan Magazine has printed a list of secret sex tips guaranteed to drive guys wild.  It’s pretty hot stuff so prepare to be shocked, gentle reader.  “Once my office ‘phone rang and when I answered I heard my girlfriend … Continue reading

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Mindless

A ‘mind reading’ airport security scanner that screens people, rather than their bags, is being tested.   The Malintent system searches the body for non-verbal cues that predict whether people intend to hurt fellow passengers.   Unfortunately, a prototype at London … Continue reading

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