Vets in South Molton, Devon, have started a new fantasy football league for cows. The competing herds win points for productivity, fertility and good health. Each herd is named after a football team so that the farmers can check their team’s progress without revealing its identity.
“Moocastle United have done well, but Uddersfield are teatering on the brink of relegation,” said a local loon. “Aston Veala and Heiferton are bullish at this stage. It’s a high steaks game of two calves but the cream will rise to the top and then things can only get butter.”
Sorry. Whey too many puns.