Category Archives: News Around

Drop dead gorgeous

Harrods are now stocking a high security fashion range that includes bullet proof dinner suits, polo shirts and denim jackets.  The clothes are priced according to protection value, the most expensive can stop automatic rifle fire, and the cheapest may … Continue reading

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Pony excess

In a week where the Global Financial Markets are going down the pan the top story in the Shires concerned a greedy pony who became inebriated after eating fermented apples, then fell into a swimming pool, and was unable to … Continue reading

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Around the block

Britain‘s laziest man takes his dog for a walk while sitting in his car.  Kevin Pyle gets his son to drive him round the block while he leads four-year-old pet bullmastiff Bruce alongside.    Our reporter offered to interview Mr … Continue reading

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No answer

A letter written by Oliver Cromwell in 1642 has been unearthed in a council office.   An Essex council spokesman said: “In the letter, dated March 1642, Cromwell recommends a Captain Dodsworth for promotion.  Unfortunately, the letter was put in our … Continue reading

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A day in the life

A man who was taken to hospital after being hit by a train had been knocked down by a car just a few minutes earlier.  Lewis, from Glasgow, Scotland, was hit by the train whilst walking his bicycle across a … Continue reading

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Mindless

A ‘mind reading’ airport security scanner that screens people, rather than their bags, is being tested.   The Malintent system searches the body for non-verbal cues that predict whether people intend to hurt fellow passengers.   Unfortunately, a prototype at London … Continue reading

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