Scientists led by Dr Ben Whalley, at the University o f Reading have used cells from the brain of a rat foetus to control a robot and help it to navigate around its enclosure.

The Open Wound sent senior journalist, Tim Flapps, to investigate.

“Hello, Dr Whalley, we’ve come to see your experiment.”
“Sorry.  You can’t.”

“Are you denying the right of the Free Press because you’re scared of being labelled ‘Frankenstein’?”
“No, you can’t see the robot because it’s escaped.  It gnawed through its cage, chewed through the skirting board and is currently living in the wall space.”

“Is this a danger to public safety?”
“Don’t worry; our emergency response measures have been instigated. “

“Which are?”
“We’ve left a piece of Edam in a trap and our maintenance man is whacking the wall with a broom to drive it out.  If I was you, I’d get up on this table with me.  And tuck your trousers into your socks.”


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