Mad about the house

There’s a tubby middle aged bloke, probably a dad.  He’s messing about with a football in his lounge and making a ‘phone call at the same time.”Hello, is that Flakey Finance, I’d like to arrange a loan?”
He nods in an intelligent way as the guys at Flakey ask him some questions.
“Yes, yes, I am a retard.”

His long suffering wife comes into the lounge, for some reason she’s videoing him.

“Hi love, I’m on the ‘phone.”
“Yes, I can see that,” she says.

“We want to borrow £25,000, right?” he mouths at her.

“You’re supposed to be booking a bloody taxi, you idiot!  Can’t you get anything right?”

“Sorry luv.”
He attempts to turn the ‘phone off and catch the ball at the same time but drops the ‘phone into the fish tank and surprises the cat with the ball.

“Why do you video me all the time luv, is it ‘cos I’m so lovely?” he laughs.

“No, it’s for evidence when I have you sectioned, you arse!”


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